why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
>
> ...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
>
> ...why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
>
> ...why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
>
> ...why doctors call what they do "practice"?
>
> ...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?
>
> ...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavour, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
>
> ...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
>
> ...why there isn't mouse-flavoured cat food?
>
> ...who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavour?
>
> ...why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
>
> ...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
>
> ...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box ?
>
> ...why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
>
> ...why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
>
> ...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
>
> ...why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
>
> AND...
>
> In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
>
> On a Myer hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
>
> On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
>
> On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)
>
> On some  frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
>
> On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
>
> On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)
>
> On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
>
> On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
>
> On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???....)
>
> On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
>
> On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."  (now, somebody out there, help me on this.  I'm a bit curious.)
>
> On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!)
>
> On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
>
> I don't blame the company.  I blame the parents for this one:  On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

>